This is a great read and a great article. I'm a cartoonist here on Medium. I can relate to practically everything you described. As an intrepid and typically vanguard type of person, I have some of those exact same feelings about whether to continue on with my activities here or take a time out from it. I'm still pondering the gravity of it all. Thanks for writing. I gave you a clap. I hope it helps. I'll keep reading your writing and giving some claps here and there. Carry on.